1) Preamble:
Understanding narcissistic men is critical since you will certainly have to deal with them.
There is one narcissistic man, with many faces.
Narcissistic men vary in terms of their intelligence (IQ), but in terms of their baseline personality they are almost all identical.
Narcissistic men express negative masculinity on the outside and embody negative femininity on the inside. They represent the worst tendencies of men, and also the worst tendencies of women; an angry gorilla on the outside, a whiney 13 year old girl on the inside.
2) Negative Femininity:
What follows are traits that narcissistic men and the worst neurotypical women have in common:
-Revels in attention
-Gossipy. Speaks negatively of others when they aren’t around.
-Petty, Vindictive -Manufactures conflict and drama out of nothing.
-Neurotic. Ranks high on personality trait neuroticism.
-Aesthetically minded. Judges people heavily on how physically attractive they are.
-Thin Skinned. Vulnerable to provocation (Law 39 offensive application). Will be enraged by insults, and will interpret neutral comments as insults.
-Cunning, yet easily manipulated. High attack and low defense. Good at manipulating others, yet they themselves are easily manipulated. Both narcissistic men and neurotypical women are vulnerable to provocation (Law 39 offensive application) because they are deeply affected by insults, and they are also both vulnerable to charm, since they both lap up complements.
-Deeply superficial. Loves shiny things. Luxurious jewelry, expensive cars, and beautiful mansions.
3) Negative Masculinity:
What follows are traits that narcissistic men and the worst neurotypical men have
in common:
-Arrogant
-Prone to extreme anger, even impulsive violence.
-Narcissistic denigration; denigrating others, so that they can feel superior in comparison.
4) Callous, yet Hypersensitive:
Narcissistic men have a callous indifference to the feelings of others, yet they themselves are hypersensitive.
They insult others without hesitation, yet they themselves are deeply hurt by insults and their hurt always manifests as anger rather than as pain or sadness. They speak to others with insolence, yet expect others to respond to them while maintaining the pinnacle of politeness.
The hallmark of a narcissistic man is this; he is arrogant, yet also thin skinned.
5) Deeply Superficial:
Narcissistic men are deeply superficial people.
They care intensely about physical attractiveness; both how they look and how other people look. They care intensely about worldly wealth; money, power, and status.
They judge others heavily by what they look like and what their status in the macro hierarchy is, and they also judge themselves heavily based on these things.
Narcissists are not spiritually minded; you will never meet a narcissist who spends a significant amount of their time reading philosophy.
6) Charming Narcissistic Men:
There is a formula for charming narcissistic men: be high status (just not so much that they dislike you because you outshine them), be good looking, and hatebond with them; hate the same things and people that they hate.
7) Ego Over Tactical Efficacy:
Many people will prioritize their ego over doing what is most tactically effective. They will reject strategies that would give positive outcomes because such strategies offend their ego, and they will use strategies that give negative or inferior outcomes because such strategies stroke their ego. Narcissistic men are the epitome of this, not the exception.
Every person on the planet will foolishly prioritize their ego over doing what is most tactically effective, at least some of the time. However, narcissistic men do this far more often than most people.
8) Confidence vs Narcissism:
It is important to distinguish between narcissists and people who simply have a healthy sense of confidence.
Narcissism is petty, vindictive, and immature. Confidence is calm and mature.
Narcissists rank high on neuroticism, confident people rank low on neuroticism.
Narcissists feel anger when insulted, confident people have zero emotional reaction to insults.
Confidence is marked by calmness. Narcissism is marked by arrogance on the outside, and neuroticism on the inside.
For an example of narcissism, see the fictional character Will Conway. For an example of confidence, see the fictional character Frank Underwood. Both are from the American drama ‘House of Cards’.
9) Charismatic Narcissists:
It would be dishonest to say that narcissism is all bad; grandiose narcissists often make great salesmen, con-men, and politicians.
While wise men find narcissists to be distasteful, fools (the masses) often find narcissists to be charismatic.
If you are in one on one conversation with a very intelligent man, the grandiosity of narcissism is likely to annoy him.
If you are trying to appeal to a large crowd of people, most of who are of average intelligence, they are likely to feel that the grandiosity of narcissism is charismatic.
In our own time, Donald Trump has the appearance of being a grandiose narcissist and roughly half the American masses are in love with him.
10) Causes of Narcissism:
Psychopathy and Autism seem to have genetic underpinnings; it seems to be the case that psychopathic and autistic men were simply ‘born that way’.
Narcissism on the other hand seems to be heavily driven by early childhood environment. Boys who are naturally disagreeable (due to genetics) and who are also abused during the first 10 years of life are disproportionately likely to grow up to become narcissists.
If child abuse were eliminated, within 1 generation narcissistic men would become far more rare.
11) Reflections from Illimitable Man:
“Confident people handle pressure with composure and quiet decorum. Narcissistic people scream like a barbarian at the gate. Narcissism is status orientated, confidence isn’t. Narcissism is petty and vengeful, confidence isn’t. Confidence is mature, narcissism is immature.”
“Narcissism has to remind people how inferior they are, confidence doesn’t.”
“The difference between confidence and narcissism is that narcissism is petty and vengeful, confidence isn’t.”
“The more narcissistic the man, the more he:
-Is vain (like women)
-Needs attention (like women)
-Judges people HEAVILY on appearance (like women)
-Is drawn to high status (like women) -Gets outraged (like women)
-Tries to be popular (like women)”
“The more egotistical the person, the more mercenary, the lower their trustworthiness and the lower their integrity, the less logical, the less loyal, the more traitorous, the more petty, the less spiritual, the more opportunistic and the more material. We’ve all met this person.”
“Be wary of gossip. It’s often insidious, agenda driven and malicious. It is low minded social violence designed to ostracise out of an insatiable vengeance for unresolved affronts to the ego, rather than maturely move on in peace.”
12) Law 19, The Arrogant and Proud Man:
“Although he may initially disguise it, this man’s touchy pride makes him very dangerous. Any perceived slight will lead to a vengeance of overwhelming violence. You may say to yourself, “But I only said such-and-such at a party, where everyone was drunk. …” It does not matter. There is no sanity behind his overreaction, so do not waste time trying to figure him out. If at any point in your dealings with a person you sense an oversensitive and overactive pride, flee! Whatever you are hoping for from him isn’t worth it.” -Law 19
13) Further Reflections:
Your confidence must be completely internalized; independent of external circumstances.
If you are confident for a reason, that’s a problem since that reason can be taken away.
If compliments make you confident, that’s a problem since it indicates you thirst for external validation.
Narcissists need something to serve as ‘narcissistic supply’. Confident people don’t; their confidence is simply always there, even in the absence of narcissistic supply.
Don’t trust a narcissistic man; his betrayal is a matter of ‘when’, not ‘if’.
Where there are problems, autistic men with high IQs will solve them. Where there are no problems, neurotypical women and narcissistic men will manufacture them so that they can enjoy the drama.