50: Men who have sterling reputations are simply masters of advertising their greatest moments and hiding their worst moments.
“Many men seem great, until you get to know them personally.” –Baltasar Gracian
Men who are viewed as great by the public, are usually viewed as mediocre by their families.
Why?
The public only see’s their best moments. Their families see both their best and worst moments.
51: If someone feels you have wronged them, then apologize and make the apology seem genuine.
Whether or not you are actually sorry is irrelevant. Don’t apologize because you are sorry. Apologize to increase the probability of them forgiving you.
Forgiveness can often be bought with nothing more than mere words. Don’t let your ego get in the way of buying forgiveness free of charge.
52: He who apologizes timidly is severely punished.
He who apologizes with a demeanor of confidence, is forgiven.
53: A ‘superior’ is anyone who wields more power over you than you do over them.
When interacting with superiors, you should appear to be deferential.
However, if you are too obsequious it causes superiors to lose respect for you, and they can never promote someone who they do not respect.
There is a delicate balance you must maintain; appear calm, but not arrogant. Appear confident, but still polite.
54: One key tactic for charming superiors is this: make them believe that your success is a result of advice that they gave.
Whenever someone gives you advice, appear grateful, and appear to agree.
Whether or not their advice is actually good is supremely irrelevant.
55: The more unequal a society is, the more violent it will be.
Poverty does not drive violence; inequality does.
As inequality rises the competition for power intensifies, and so far as seizing power is concerned violence is the nuclear option.
56: A man wants to be powerful enough such that he can take care of himself, and take care of the people he loves.
A woman wants to be loved by a man who is powerful enough to be capable of taking care of her.
57: Within books on psychology and machiavellianism you will find ten thousand different strategies and tactics.
Of those ten thousand, only 100 will be relevant to your life.
Only 10 will be relevant to your life on a regular basis.
Essentially, there is a pareto distribution of how relevant various strategies and tactics are.
58: In your network you will have around 1,000 contacts.
900 of them give very little use to you, 90 of them give significant use, and 10 of them are critical.
Essentially, in your contact list there will be a pareto distribution of how useful each person is to you.
How much time and energy you are willing to expend in order to maintain a relationship with and keep them happy should be proportionate to how useful they are to you currently, and how useful they are likely to be in the future.
59: If a thing is revealed brazenly, it seems fake; contrived.
If a thing is revealed subtly, it seems real; genuine.
This is certainly true of compliments.
A direct compliment is likely to be perceived as disingenuous; desperate flattery.
An indirect compliment is likely to be perceived as sincere.
60: If you can deal with narcissistic men who are intelligent and borderline personality disorder women who are intelligent, you can deal with anyone.
High IQ NPD men and high IQ BPD women are the most difficult people on the planet to deal with.
What they have in common is that they are both neurotic and thin skinned. They are both fragile.
Ironically, the most fragile people in the world and the most dangerous people in the world…are the same people.
61: When someone asks you for a favor you should do it if possible.
There is a very high probability that at some point in the future, in a way you could not possibly foresee, you will need a favor from them; if you refuse to help them during their hour of need, they will remember this, and refuse to help you during your hour of need.
62: If someone refuses to do you a favor because they see no way they benefit by helping you, tell them, “At some point in the future, in a way that neither of us could possibly foresee, you will need my help with something. If you don’t help me now, I will not help you then.”
This tactic may sound extreme; it is.
It comes at the cost of guaranteeing the person will dislike you, and there is a very high probability that it won’t work.
Only use this technique if the matter at hand is important enough to warrant it.
63: Never complain, particularly in front of others.
People have their own problems to worry about; hearing about yours only annoys them.
Caveat: You can charm a person by complaining about the same thing they are complaining about. Hatebond with them; hate the same things, and the same people, who they hate.
64: Behavior that seems insane to you may be perfectly rational for the person engaging in it.
It is likely that given your circumstances such behavior would be insane, but given their circumstances such behavior would be completely rational.
65: If you are in a position where you have a lot to lose, taking high risk high reward bets seems like insanity.
However, for a man with nothing to lose taking high risk high reward bets is completely rational; relatively speaking such a man has little to lose and a lot to gain.
People who are genuinely insane are very rare.
66: If during an ally’s darkest hour you refuse to help them, the worthlessness of your loyalty shall be remembered forever.
They will never trust you again, and they will most likely refuse to ever help you again.
Indeed, they may be so enraged by your disloyalty that they actively plot revenge.
On the other hand if during an ally’s darkest hour you are there to help them, they will remember your loyalty forever and be very willing to help you in the future.
When your ally is in their darkest hour, you have a very important choice to make.
67: If they are willing to do it to someone else, they are willing to do it to you.
68: A man who is useless is more likely to face ostracism than a woman who is useless.
Uselessness is more socially acceptable in a woman, than in a man.
This is because men are success objects and women are not.
69: Sadness and depression are bad for your health. Anger and narcissism are also bad for your health.
However, sadness and depression will destroy your performance, and while anger and narcissism are not ideal for performance they are an immense improvement over sadness and depression.
If your life is terrible, do what you can to convert your suffering into anger and narcissism.
As unhealthy as these mental states can be, they may give you the energy needed to drive ahead.
70: An adviser can be valuable for many reasons. Most obviously, they may have valuable insights that you don’t.
More importantly, you are inevitably emotionally involved in the situations you face. You lack the mental clarity needed to do careful analysis of the situations you face. An advisor on the other hand is completely emotionally detached from the situations you face.
71: Impulsive and egotistical people cannot be entrusted with leadership positions.
As such, narcissistic men cannot be entrusted with leadership positions.
This sounds obvious, yet incredibly often many people find a narcissistic man to be charismatic and consequently they attain a position of power.
72: Be distrustful of gossips.
If a person speaks negatively of others when they aren’t around, chances are they will speak negatively of you when you aren’t around.
In the same spirit, be hesitant to speak negatively of others.
Speaking negatively of others makes you look bad, speaking positively of others makes you look good.
73: It is rare if ever that a woman has the power to harm a man directly.
Almost always the only power a woman has to harm a man comes indirectly, by appropriating the power of other men against him.
74: Men control civilization. Women control men.
The man behind the curtain is a woman.
75: High stress complex problem solving while in zero sum competition against adversaries who are intelligent and cunning.
Where will you find this?
-War
-Politics
-Business
76: When ending a relationship of any kind, do so as gently and as politely as possible.
You want to minimize the chance of the other party feeling so insulted that they go out of their way to seek vengeance.
This sounds obvious, yet many ignore it at their peril.
77: If you continuously treat someone like trash, sooner or later one of the following will happen:
-If they are the vengeful and vindictive type, they will take revenge.
-If they are the calm and rational type, they will simply cease their dealings with you. They will decide that associating with you is more trouble than it is worth.
This sounds obvious, yet it is often ignored.
78: The person who is the most competent, and the person who is the most likeable, are almost never the same person.
Competence and likeability/charm are 2 entirely separate things; I’d say the correlation between them is about zero.
79: If you are both competent and charming, you thrive.
If you are incompetent and charming, you survive.
If you are offensive or boring, and competent, you survive.
If you are neither competent nor charming, you die.
80: Hitler never killed anyone with his own hands. Words were his only weapons.
Words are the most dangerous weapon in the universe, because they determine who becomes the target of physical weapons.
81: Both men and women do evil. However, women are viewed as being more virtuous than men.
This is because the evil of men tends to be overt, while the evil of women tends to be covert.
82: Resentment has a critical purpose; it tells you to fight back against your oppressors.
Of course, resentment that lasts a long time or resentment that is directed at someone who has done no harm to you is pathological.
Humans have the bias of resenting anyone above them in the dominance hierarchy; assuming that their superiors are oppressing them, even if in reality they are not.
If you took this pathology and turned it into an ideology, it would be The Communist Manifesto by Karl Marx.
83: For the sake of winning, you will need to use some strategies and tactics that others would consider immoral.
Yet at the same time, you must appear to be a paragon of virtue, or at least a person who isn’t heinous.
If people perceive that you are evil, they will be far less inclined to do you favors and may outright ostracize you.
The duplicity you must execute is this: utilize whatever methods are most effective, while at the same time concealing the use of any that would be considered immoral.
84: When interests and incentives align, managing a relationship is effortless.
When interests and incentives do not align, managing a relationship is an endless war.
85: A dedicated minority can dominate a complacent majority.
86: To establish a relationship with a powerful person, it may be necessary for you to approach them to initiate conversation.
Avoid this if possible. Ideally, have them approach you.
How can you gain their attention (in a positive way), and make them interested in having a conversation with you?
Be exceptionally good at whatever work you do, and look good; literally be physically attractive.
87: Most people engage in zero critical thinking or rigorous logical reasoning. They operate off instinct and emotion.
Don’t overestimate your competitors, or the targets of your manipulations.
88: Never put your enemy into a position where they have nothing to lose.
If they find themselves in such a position, they may decide to burn down everything; including you.
89: A man filled with both ambition and despair will engage in extreme risk taking.
He desires to ascend and he has nothing to lose, so using high risk high reward strategies is perfectly rational.
It’s incredible what a man is capable of once he has given up hope.
90: If you are a loser and you are on track for this to continue in the future, you should be willing to take risks.
You have nothing to lose in the sense that you have a life not worth living.
Continue to execute high risk high reward strategies until you either win, or die.
Death is nothing, but to live and be a loser is to die every day.
91: Power struggles are ubiquitous.
There are power struggles even between people who love each other.
92: Micro-machiavellianism is the manipulation of one other person, or manipulation within the context of a small group.
Macro-machiavellianism is the manipulation of a large group.
93: The average woman is more cunning than the average man.
However, the cunning of most women is limited to the micro.
When it comes to succeeding in job interviews, office politics, and family politics, women excel.
When it comes to macro-machiavellianism, say recognizing the lies contained within a political narrative or mass distributed propaganda, women are generally incompetent.
Women are easily persuaded by political and religious propaganda.
94: Women have high attack, but low defense.
They are good at manipulating others, but they themselves are easily manipulated
95: Nothing will unite people faster than a common enemy.
For the sake of uniting people, it may be necessary to manufacture an enemy.
96: When psychologically normal men engage in violence, they are fueled by rage or fear.
When psychopathic men engage in violence they are cold and detached, as if deciding which suit to wear.
The hallmark of psychopathy is this: to be cold and detached when inflicting harm upon others.
97: Controlling the flow of information is critical, since perception trumps reality.
What is unseen counts for nothing, what is seen is all that counts.
98: When powerful people speak in public, they never use straighttalk; they always use powertalk.
They aren’t saying what they actually think.
The masses don’t realize this.
99: Insults should have zero impact on your psychological state.
Becoming angry when insulted is not a sign of strength; it’s a sign of weakness.